it’s been a crazy week and i find myself looking for solace – in whatever form. today i let myself sleep in, which isn’t hard considering i live in a bedroom with no windows. i painted the walls white to give the illusion of light, but waking up is always difficult. i came upstairs, made a pour over, and sat down to eat bacon, yogurt and muesli. there is a window in our living room that gives off the best light. a small white desk sits underneath, cradling books, a lamp and several potted plants. i like to sit and read or write there in the mornings. people are always walking by, holding hands or walking their dogs. it is idyllic.

i sat down to enjoy breakfast and read. reading is a luxury these days because i’m often in my car, on the go. i’m finishing “small victories” by anne lamott. she’s my hands-down all time favorite author, perhaps because she’s seen hardship, death and addiction but she’s full of life, honesty and God.

i saw her speak at the end of last year and i’ve decided, now over a month into the new year, that i want to focus on living out what she spoke. she read a few excerpts from her books, answered questions and talked about life. she’s 60, has dreads and i don’t have a lot in common with her. someone stopped my friend and i after the lecture, asking why we came. she was a little surprised we were there and as we looked around the room, we saw why. most of the people there were at least a good two decades older than us – we were by far the youngest. the truth is, i think we were there because we wanted to hear truth – that life is shi**y, but it is good.

as for what she said:
* refuse to stop crying because God loves real
* when all is said and done, all we have is stories and compassion (barry lopez)
* practice militant self-care
* allow no scary people in your life
* listen to the questions and answers i have. they often hold valuable keys in how to live a good life

these are lessons that learned over and over again, throughout a life. but here’s to starting now.

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